My 2 Cents

Queer Liberal Ranting from Seattle

13 Ways to Know You’re a TRUE Seattleite

Posted by Chris on 8 May, 2008

The only good thing about today is that it’s Thursday, which means that I work at home tomorrow, that it’s Friday tomorrow and of course that today is the return of the infamous Thursday 13.  This week we’ll be taking a look at how to tell that you’re a true Seattleite.  Want to join in on the fun and frolic?  Head over to the Thursday 13 site and create your own post!  (this idea stolen & adapted from Citizen Rain)

A true Seattleite:

  1. is irritated when a tourist asks to see the original Starbucks, Kurt Cobain’s house, the Space Needle or the Monorail. True Seattleites do not care for these things.
  2. considers Seattle to be the very best city on Earth, but will tell you how it rains every single day to keep you from moving here.
  3. is a pretentious coffee snob due to the thousands of delicious coffee houses and roastaries that surround them.
  4. knows not to visit Pike Place Market on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday and is irritated by the crowds when they do visit.
  5. is disgusted by the EMP.
  6. knows that “eating dicks” means eating burgers.
  7. hates it when Californians visit Washington and whine about the rain and the cold.
  8. doesn’t look twice when they see a same-sex couple holding hands in public, regardless of the neighborhood they’re in.
  9. answers with their neighborhood name when asked where they live, not with Seattle.
  10. owns multiple umbrellas, but doesn’t know where any of them are.
  11. recycles everything and will nag those who don’t.
  12. knows all the ways to get from Ballard to downtown without using I-5 or Hwy 99.
  13. supports locally owned, independent restaurants and shops over chains and corporate stores.

26 Responses to “13 Ways to Know You’re a TRUE Seattleite”

  1. Steve Rebooted Says:

    Very good list. I could always tell a tourist cuz they were pretty much the only people who used umbrellas!

  2. Robin Says:

    You know, I’m beginning to believe you about #2. Everyone talks about how awful the weather is, but every time I’ve been there it’s been gorgeous! I love Seattle, if I were ever to move back to the States that’s probably where I’d go.

  3. Natalie Says:

    I’ve wanted to visit there for so long! Don’t worry I won’t ask where those places are.

  4. Sue Says:

    Awwwww But I WANT to see Kurt Cobain’s old house .. lol ;) Great list idea :) Happy TT and thanks so much for stopping by!

  5. Princess Says:

    I LOVE Starbucks so I probably would be one of those people who would irritate you if I ever made it up to Seattle. Great list though :-) I should make one for where I live :-)

  6. Northwest Says:

    Then I’m 2/3 true Seattleite, although in spirit I’m 100%.

    I would add one more criterion: “You accept as a fact of life that Spring means grey skies and rain, punctuated by one sunny day per month (roughly).”

  7. Maggie's Mind Says:

    I love Seattle, but I’ve mostly just done the touristy thing, and that more when I lived on the Washington side of the border instead of the Oregon side. Portland is similar, but y’all have your own thing going up there. Fun list!

  8. Chris Says:

    Steve ~ I have at least 5 or 6 umbrellas somewhere…
    Robin ~ there’s nothing more beautiful than a summer evening in Seattle. I love the gloaming, it can last until 10:30 at night. I love sitting out in the backyard with friends and a nice bottle of wine…
    Natalie ~ come visit - you’ll love it :)
    Sue ~ sorry I have no idea where it is actually LOL
    Princess ~ when outside the PNW Starbucks is sometimes the only viable coffee option so I’ll cut you some slack… here though you have to hit the independent shops
    NW ~ it’s the spirit that counts!
    Maggie ~ I like PDX, I used to work downtown before we moved to Seattle. Never lived there, but have spent a lot of time there. IF I couldn’t live here it would be there for sure.

  9. Johnina Says:

    So does that mean it really doesn’t rain there everyday? Just checking

  10. Chris Says:

    Johnina ~ we have a few sunny days now and then, but I’m not supposed to admit that…

  11. Brandon Says:

    Oh my god, one of things I miss the most about living in Seattle is all of my shortcuts through the city. I can get from Ballard to almost anywhere without ever hitting 99 or I-5 and it used to make me so happy.

    I had a friend recently get stuck in traffic trying to come from I-5 to the Key Arena and he called me and I was able to guide him, from California, on the side roads.

    I can’t wait to get back up there soon. Only a couple months left.

  12. Brandon Says:

    And I love Steve Rebooted’s comment…it’s true, us native Washingtonians rarely use umbrellas. I personally don’t even own one. My wife, does, but I won’t use it.

  13. Jen Says:

    About the umbrellas thing… people always say that in the NW you can tell who’s a tourist by whether or not they carry an umbrella. I don’t think that’s true necessarily, because lots of locals carry umbrellas; we just don’t let NOT having one stop us from doing anything. And as far as the owning vs. actually carrying, I’ve got 4 or 5 in my house but don’t know where any are right now. I don’t even keep one in my car.

    When people complain about the rain here it’s hard for me not to scream, “Why do you think everything that comes out of the ground is green and beautiful here? RAIN! And why do you think the desert is so god-awful ugly and brown? NO RAIN!”

    Good list, Chris!

  14. Chris Says:

    Brandon ~ I never drive on the freeways or 99 if I can help it. I love cruising through the neighborhoods and dig that I can take a different way to the same old place each time, if I wish to.
    Jen ~ thanks Jen. My parents come visit from Eastern OR and complain and complain about the rain and the damp and the cold and I always point out that we have nice green lush surroundings while they live in a brown wasteland.

  15. madhouse6 Says:

    i’ve only been once - but i enjoyed seattle - and it didn’t rain once in 5 days.

  16. Chris Says:

    Madhouse ~ shhhh, don’t tell anyone!

  17. Secret Agent Mama Says:

    Seattlites sounds God-damned cool!

  18. Ann Bruce Says:

    You have to be lying about the weather. It’s not rained once when I visited.

  19. Jennifer Says:

    Great list. Not nearly as gross as mine. lol

    My parents are going to Seattle on vacation next month. They only care about the way to the baseball game.

    Happy TT!

  20. pussreboots Says:

    The rain is one of the reasons why I’d love to move there. Happy TT.

  21. Chris Says:

    Secret Agent Mama ~ of course we are!
    Ann Bruce ~ shhhhh!
    Jennifer ~ they’ll have a great time, Safeco field is actually fun when it’s nice
    Pussreboots ~ I love the rain, I actually miss it in the summer

  22. Mike Says:

    I love to visit home. Key word there is “visit”. ;)

  23. Chris Says:

    Mike ~ once it’s in your blood….

  24. YummY! Says:

    The first starbucks is in Seattle? I didn’t know there WAS first. I thought it had just sort of always been. Like, “On the 8th day God said, ‘Let there be Starbucks’ and there was. And He saw that it was lucrative and said, ‘Let there be Starbucks on Every corner.”

  25. Chris Says:

    YummY! ~ I know it seems like they sprang from the loins of jeebus, but yes, the very first Starbucks is in Seattle

  26. tipsandtricks Says:

    This has been an insightful post. Happy TT.

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