13 jobs I’d rather have than my own right now…

Generally I love my job, it gives me a huge amount of flexibility, I’m doing something that I enjoy (most of the time) and I don’t even have to work that hard most of the time. Unless I’m in front of a class I usually have plenty of time to blog and keep up with my blog reader. So, yeah, it’s all freakin’ roses here except for the fact that my boss is a rant redacted to hopefully keep my ass from getting fired (gee Chris tell us how you really feel about it). He’s the reason I’ve taken my resume out of cold storage and started updating it in preparation for placement on Monster and the like. *sigh* I hate changing jobs!

With that in mind I knew I had my Thursday 13 post for this week, so with a quick aside to tell you to join in on the fun over at Thursday 13 central, I present for your reading pleasure (or torture) the 13 jobs I’d really rather have right now than my own… (totally forgot that this was a theme week until after I’d written this post)

*** #s 1-5 are a bit dreamy and lofty, the rest are what I’ll be forced to choose from with my luck***

1. The author of the next great novel sensation. Of course this would require that I actually sit down and write something other than blog posts… Okay probably not going to happen any time soon.
2. Celebrity chef. I’d be perfectly happy with just being a chef with a moderately popular and successful restaurant in Seattle. This one would require that I go to Culinary School and that’s not going to happen either.
3. Photographer who can sell his photos at whatever crazy ass price he demands to magazines and the public at large.
4. Cake decorator for Chef Duff Goldman. This one would require that I move to Baltimore and either go to pastry school or at least learn how to decorate a cake.
5. Gigolo to the stars. Hell, I’d even swing both ways for this gig. How bad could it be having to put out for cash to the beautiful people? Of course these are the very people that don’t need gigolos and I probably would need to work out a lot more than I do right now for this to work.
6. Lottery winner. This might not sound like work, but it actually is. You have to go somewhere and buy the tickets in such bulk numbers that you can’t help but win something. Your only goal is to win more than you spend… I’m bad at statistics, but I’m not that freaking bad I think maybe I’ll pass on this one.
7. Counter attendant at a gas station or 7-11 or similar. With my luck I’ll be stuck with the graveyard shift.
8. Anything that requires me to either scrape the grease off my face at the end of the day or to end every customer interaction with the phrase “Do you want fries with that?”
9. Baby network administrator for a company that’s going to pay me 1/3 of what my current salary is because I don’t have any “practical experience” being a network admin, though I taught people how to do it for years.
10. Help desk technician. “Have you rebooted sir?” “Is your pc plugged in?” are both questions I’ll be asking as I bang my head on my desk and wish I were dead.
11. Towel boy at the gym earning only tips. Okay, now this might actually not be so bad except for the lack of actual income.
12. Waiter in a family restaurant. See any of my posts that reference children and you’ll understand why that one terrifies me so much.
13. Software trainer aka road warrior. I’ve done it, I don’t want to do it again, no you can’t make me get back on that damn plane twice a week! I really can’t stand the thought of living out of a suitcase again and it shoots my workouts and diet to hell.

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